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HOW TO MAKE NEW YORK GIRLS REALIZE THEY WOULD RATHER BE WITH ADAM WADE: Part 5

By Adam Wade

Installment 5: Dedicated to Peaches R.I.P.

Peaches, my family's beloved cat recently passed away at the age of 18 (Human years). She was multi-colored with white paws (She looked like she was wearing little white shoes). Peaches was a tough cat, she once got stuck in a neighbor's garage for two weeks in December of 1993 without food or water, and was also once shot in the front right arm by a BB gun. She used to catch, kill and sometimes decapitate New Hampshire field mice and would leave them on our front doorstep. My dad used to say that Peaches was just misunderstood, and that she mauled the field mice to somehow prove her love to me.

What stands out in my mind as the quintessential Peaches moment happened my junior year in high school.

I was going to go to the Valentine's Day Semi-formal with Bridget Saunders. I hit the jackpot. Bridget was a pretty, popular senior. She had long curly blonde hair and was co captain of the girls soccer team.

The week before I had heard from my cousin Greg that she didn't have a date so I just called her and that was it. She had to pick me up because even though I was 17, I didn't have my driver's license.

She came to our house and WOW! She looked just like Heather Thomas from TV's "The Fall Guy." My parents started to take a couple of photos of the two of us, and then my dad did the unthinkable.

"Bridget, did you see Peaches the cat, over there? She's jealous of you."

Bridget looked at Peaches sitting on the blue sofa. The cat was glaring at her.

"Why is she doing that?" Bridget asked confused,

My dad joyfully said, "Because Peaches is Adam's sister."

Bridget smiled at me. "That's so cute."

I smiled back.

But my dad wasn't finished. "Peaches is also Adam's
girlfriend."

I stood there motionless and opened my mouth in shock.

The semi-formal was held in the school cafeteria, and from the moment we walked in, I was in the zone. I have always sucked at dancing, but it didn't matter, I was with BRIDGET SAUNDERS! So there I was right there in the middle of the dancefloor shaking like a human-sized cardboard cut-out to AC/DC's "You Shook Me All Night Long." I drew stares of disbelief from my peers.

"Did Adam Wade do mushrooms?" I heard somebody shout on
the dancefloor.

Then Meatloa's "I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't
Do that)" started to play and I asked Bridget if we could slow dance.

"Do you think Peaches would mind?"

Ugh. That hurt.

At the end of the night she pulled up to my house, I turned to her and said nervously, "Bridget, I had a great time can I give you a kiss?"

She put her hand in my hand and softly said, "Adam, I just couldn't do that to Peaches."

I stood in the front of my driveway and watched Bridget's red Ford Tempo drive off in the night. Feeling empty, I slowly headed to the front steps and noticed not one, not two but THREE headless field mice all lying there motionless.

I smiled and knocked on the front door with my head up high.

I'll never forget you Peaches.

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Ladies! Stop browsing through your high school yearbook in hopes of seeing photos of a young Adam Wade. Drop him a line directly!

EMAIL ADAM WADE

 

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